Ears perked up for the last ten minutes of class when my professor started talking about sex. Although my professor’s examples of his personal sex life behind closed doors were a bit of an over share, I did enjoy his parallelism between music and sex. Like music, sex would not be nearly as satisfying if it weren’t for rhythm. Rhythm is defined as a strong, regular, repeated pattern of movement.

A song with an unclear harmony or static rhythm is not enjoyable. It is when the notes are congruent, the chorus is harmonious and the lyrics are in sync that makes a song good. The melody is pleasing to the ears and if left lingering throughout your mind. With sex, similar things must be in order to produce a successful product. Sex requires the understanding of each other’s bodies, the position in which one is placed, and the ability to move your body in a fashion that coincides with your partner. Some of the worst sex I have ever had has lacked rhythm. Although I blame the guy’s small penis, he still had no idea that his “signature” move sucked and got me nowhere near a climax. But maybe this bad sex was missing harmony. Don’t get me wrong; I say harmony in a way that relates to the physical movement of your bodies, not the lovey dovey, rainbow, and flower singing lovemaking. Go read a Nicholas Sparks’ book for that romantic shit.

Regardless, sex is skill that requires practice and more practice. The overall repeating motions of sex need to be consistent and flow smoothly.  Sex would not be enjoyable if everything was out of tune and if one partner was tone deaf. A song is broken down into different components in which are then repeated for continuous enjoyment.  With a great song the chorus is catchy and you find yourself humming the tune in the shower. Everyone knows there is a certain “rhythm” to sex. The word thrusting comes to my mind. The thrusting of the guy’s hips against the girl’s receiving body is absolute satisfaction and creates a mind-blowing experience. The rhythm of your favorite song creates a warm sensation that flows through your body and pumps endorphins rapidly. Singing your lungs out as you tap your hands on the steering wheel to your favorite song is strangely similar to the screaming and moaning that’s heard during sex as the headboard pounds against the shared wall with your roommate.

The tune, rhythm, harmony, lyrics, melody, and chorus all combine to make a song amazing. However, jumping around from note to note and lyrics that are jumbled inevitably makes the song a disaster. In bed, switching positions every five seconds won’t guide you to the fireworks you long for. Committing to one gratifying position will undoubtedly result in the toe-curling climax you crave. Climaxing while doing the dirty is directly correlated to a climax in a song. Artists build up the rhythm of a song that leads to a speaker busting and crescendo explosion of music. The bass bumping creates a vibration though the seats of you car that you can’t help but secretly take pleasure in. Oddly enough, similar explosions and headboard banging bass occur while you’re getting it on. If it were not for rhythm, I believe many of us would lose two of our favorite hobbies, sex and music, music and sex.