Even though there has never been a better time in our country's history to be gay, coming out of the closet can be a real b@tch (not that I'd know). Parents often have a big problem with it, especially if they wanted you to join the army. If you are gearing up to drop the "I'm gay" bomb on you folks, here are some of the possible reactions that they might have.  

Fellas,

Do you sometimes have communication problems with your girlfriend? If so, it's not your fault. You just aren't fully understanding what they are actually saying. Here is some help.  

(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are 
right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes: If she is 
getting dressed, this means a half an hour. 
Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more 
minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, 
and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing 
usually end in fine.

We found this post on Craigslist rideshare in Vermont, but like most hilarious things it was pulled shortly after going up. So here's what you missed. Original post was here before being flagged.

vermont craigslist > rideshare

Offering Ride to Boston this Weekend (Burlington)

Reply to: comm-943759097@craigslit.org

Date: 2008-12-03, 4:24PM EST

hi, i have friends in somerville that im going to visit this weekend and am looking for some company. that i definitely wont rape. i promise.

to prove it, here are pictures of me with girls, not raping them.

whoops, that last one was a mistake. im such a jokester.

The following is an example of why ex lovers shouldn't email after a break up. 

From: J_82

Date: Feb 12, 2006 1:24 PM

RE: I hate u!

f@ck you!  I hate you and am sorry that you are alive.  die sh!tthead! I couldn’t be more happy if you spend the rest of your life sad and alone.

From: ronny_182

Date: Feb 13, 2006 6:54 PM

RE: RE: I hate u!

Oh, nice to hear from you.  I figured by now you’d of gotten arrested by the whore police. Why he hell are you emailing me?  Get a life, please.  I have moved on and so should you. we only dated for three weeks.

From: J_82

Date: Feb 19, 2006 8:03 AM

RE: RE: RE: I hate u!

you rock. and you have a small dick!

youre friends are pathetic weed smoking idiots. its especially cool to waste all of dear old dad's money on sitting on your lazy asses.

Believe me, it gets way better...

I was wondering if you wanted to get together for a beer or something?